"Being Touch"? Thanks, but no thanks.

Yes we did.

Jaunting across the southwest and periodically turning on outrageous Southern accents to make bizarre observations about the scenery, politics, and HD TV (Hand of the Devil, Ah tell you. Hand of the Devil), Steven and I passed through none other than Roswell, New Mexico, bastion of . . . normalcy? The streetlights are all alien heads, and the local snowcone stand sells alien cones, and I don't think we saw even one native Roswellian while we were there. The UFO Museum and Research Library held a world map where people could put pins in their hometowns, and we found pinholes in it from Bulawayo, Zimbabwe, various islands in the South Pacific, nearly every country in the Middle East, and lots of other interesting places. What we did not find, however, were specimens preserved in glass jars, a la most expectations of alien obsession. Perhaps one day.

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